They say there’s something for everyone in Orlando. And now, that’s really true. You see, until this month, Central Florida locals and visitors have been sorely lacking an essential dining experience. Some people truly enjoy being teased, jostled, and ribbed by the wait staff while enjoying their meals, and now we don’t have to go to Gatlinburg, Vegas, or Myrtle Beach to do it. Dick’s Last Resort opened in the new section of the Premium Outlet Mall near Disney World in January, 2014, and there are five good reasons why a person would want to visit this establishment:
Number 5: You get to wear a silly hat. If you’ve always dreamed of wearing a big white paper hat with an embarrassing comment written on it, this is your place. People were walking around with hats reading “Instant Cougar, Just Add Alcohol,” “Living Proof That Rogaine Doesn’t Work,” and “Trailer Park Queen.” So if that’s what you want, this is your place.
Number 4: Divorce Parties. This is a specialty of Dick’s Last Resort. The waiters are very attentive to the ladies, and will make everyone feel special. Plus, there’s LOTS of alcohol and distracting merriment. And the sign in the bathroom over the mirror says Sexy. If that doesn’t make you feel better, than NOTHING will!
Number 3: Giant Cups You Get To Keep. The delicious pina coladas are served in tiki coconut cups that you get to take home with you at the end of the night. They even have slots cut in the tops so you can use them as piggy banks. Pretty cool, Huh? And the Infamous Killa Rita is 64 ounces of tequila, curacao and lime served on the rocks in an awesome lime green plastic cup that makes an awesome souvenir. My kids said it’s their favorite thing yet that I’ve brought home from a restaurant.
Number 1: Breakups. It’s nice to break up with someone in person, instead of sending them a text. But who wants to sit down over a romantic dinner for hours with a person you’re going to dump? Just take them to Dick’s Last Resort. The service is quick, so you won’t have to linger. The waiters keep the energy up and it’s so loud in there that you won’t be able to have much of a conversation once you let your former loved one down gently.